My pregnancy (like most teen pregnancies) was not planned at all. I was 18 when I found out that I was pregnant with my son, and it was by far one of the most frightening things that had happened to me. I couldn’t wrap my head around the fact that I was going to be a mother, and before I was even hit 20 years old.
In all honesty, I never really wanted children before getting pregnant. I didn’t think that motherhood would suit me, that I’d be a bad mother, and frankly, most children bug me. Of course, I was completely wrong. I am an awesome mom, and I take pride in that.
Of course, I don’t recommend getting pregnant until you are absolutely ready, both mentally and financially, and I’m not saying that 15 year old girls should be going out and getting pregnant, because they should not, but personally, I am thankful for the fact that I got pregnant and had my son at a young age. It changed me as a person in so many good ways.
I love the fact that I have a child, and that I get to experience mother hood sooner than some have. I love waking up to my son beside me, I love watching him grow and helping him learn new things. In all honesty, I even love the hard times and the sleep deprivation, because I know that it is all for my baby. Before getting pregnant, I didn’t care as much about people or things. I went through a really rough period when I didn’t even see my friends. I moved an hour away from everybody, I didn’t do much, and most of time was spent in my little apartment alone while my boyfriend was working. For years I had struggled with bullying, insecurity and mental health problems. I couldn’t see myself doing anything that would benefit myself or the people around me, or even maintaining good relationships. I truly felt awful about myself.
Getting pregnant was kind of a “saving grace” to me. I became caring more about the people in my life again, and more importantly, I started caring more about myself and my health for almost the first time in years.
I still have so much of my life ahead of me, and just because I can’t go out whenever, and have absolute freedom to do as I please all the time, doesn’t mean that I won’t enjoy my young-adulthood. If anything, I am enjoying my life so much more being a mommy than I would if I was not one. I have found myself to be capable of things that I never thought I was capable of, and loving somebody in a way that I have never loved before. My son gave me the strength to do things that I could not before, and to see myself in ways that I never thought I would.